Rescue

Rescue.

One word that means something completely different to every person who reads it. To the 45 million people trapped in slavery right now the word rescue is likely as far off in their minds as the words lottery winner are in mine. Wining millions would be nice, but it’s not the reality that I live in, so why even hope for it. Many people around the world have no choice in their lives. Born a slave, live a slave, and die a slave. In my world I can make choices, I can choose to pursue an education and can joyfully spend time with friends and family.

Currently I am working for a nonprofit called International Justice Mission (IJM). They choose to speak up for those trapped in slavery all over the world and bring rescue into the lives of unsuspecting men, women, and children.  It is amazing to hear all of the beautiful stories that IJM shares about the restoration process that begins with a rescue. But the rescue process is not as cut and dry as some might think. The local law enforcement needs to take time to fully analyze the situation. They need to know exactly when and where to organize the rescue. The operation also needs to be kept quiet. If the traffickers catch wind of a plan, they could pick up and move locations taking the lives of innocent people to a new dark location. A rescue takes so much dedication and determination but the reward is freedom. Physical, mental, and emotional freedom. The men, women and children who are saved in these operations usually have no idea that it is coming. They are just living in this world of darkness some are hoping for rescue, others have given up the dream of ever being free. Then one day…everything changes. Freedom is no longer a nice idea, but a reality.

I think sometimes we get so wrapped up in thinking that because we are not physically restrained like many around the world that we don’t need rescue. Yet many of us are stuck in our own slavery. We are stuck in fear, pride, bad relationships, shame and hopelessness.

 Colossians 1: 13-14 says

 “For he has rescued us from the kingdom of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of his dear Son, who purchased our freedom and forgave our sins.” NLT

Jesus is the ultimate rescue operation. He already did the intel gathering, the planning, and he knew the perfect time to come and set the world free from darkness. God did not just come to set us free physically, but to free us from the mental slavery that we all experience. I wonder if God is like our rescue operations team. He knows we are not living in freedom, even if we think nothing will ever change, he knows the rescue is just around the corner. He is patiently reminding us that he is with us in the darkness, and that he will lead us into the light.

God never wants us to feel alone, because he has already sent in the rescue team. Once we accept that we have been rescued it means we no longer have to live in fear, instead we can rejoice in freedom.

Comfort Zone

If I had to describe my ideal comfort zone in two words, it would be "Church Camp". If you know me you know that I grew up going to camp. Every summer since 2nd grade I have been at church camp. I grew up in the church and that is comfortable for me. Being outside swimming in a dirty lake, getting eaten by mosquitoes, and praising God in a room full of Jr. Highers who haven't seen a shower in 4 days is what I live for. God has done some amazing things in my life while I remained in my comfort zone. I even got to attend a school that, well basically is church camp with homework.

During my senior year of college I assumed I would stay in this awesome zone God had always allowed me to stay in. I was taking a "how to adult class" (don't remember what the real name of the class was) and during the first day we had to talk about where we saw ourselves in 5 years. I had no real idea so I went with what I knew and said I would be working/ running a camp. During this one semester God called me out. He put an idea in my heart that I never would have come up with on my own. Law School. Now I know many of you already know this story, but you might not realize how surprised I was when this thought first came to my mind. Like I freaked out a little. I am someone who would rather travel the globe and be a missionary (like my parents), work in a church, or at a camp, I worried God had me confused with someone else.

I gave God lots of time to change his mind....yet here I am less than a year later and accepted to 4 out of the 5 schools I have applied to (still waiting to hear from #5). God has proved in ways I never imagined and going outside of my comfort zone took more faith than anything I have had to do. He put the destination Washington DC on my heart and so I immediately started looking for how I could get out there before I even started school. As I was searching Google I came across an internship position with International Justice Mission (IJM). IJM is a nonprofit that seeks justice for those in modern day slavery all around the world. The deadline for the application was in one week, so I sat down updated my resume, cover letter, etc. and sent in the application. I prayed about it and didn't really expect to hear back. After two interviews I got the unpaid internship, and was thrilled about moving out to DC. I have been raising support for the last couple months but the full picture of what this meant did not hit me until I started packing today.

As I started packing I realized what I am doing. I am moving by myself to a new city, a city that I have only visited one other time. I am moving in with someone I have never met in person. I will be learning to use public transportation and will be paying much more for just about everything. I will be getting to DC as the new President of the United States will be inaugurated, the whole world will be watching this new place I am calling home. Honestly, I'm scared, I tried telling God this is too far outside of my comfort zone, that I can't do this. But his gentle voice calmed me and reminded me that I was right, I can't do this, but He can.

Matthew 19:26 "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

God will speak to us in our comfort zones, but eventually he will call us out. God knows that new faith comes when we step out of the known and dive head first into the unknown. So, here I go! In three 1/2 weeks I will be officially leaving my comfort zone. I am excited and nervous all at once, but I know that God has called me and will provide for me.

Fog

Today I was driving to church and the fog was so dense, I could barely see the car in front of me let alone the road ahead. I had driven the same road before so I could predict where the exit was on the highway without needing to see the exit sign. While I was driving I was just so thankful I have been on this road before. If I was in a new town trying to follow someone's directions I would be so lost! The signs for roads were visible only after I was passing them.

Today at church we talked about taking risks and stepping out in faith. Doing things just because God asks us is so much harder when we can't see the road or the street signs. Sometimes stepping out in faith is like driving in fog. We can see a little bit of road directly in front of us and we can choose to follow the tail lights of a car leading the way, but it makes us feel nervous in unfamiliar areas.

I feel like I am driving in a fog right now with my future.  Thankfully God is the car in front of me and I am turning when God turns and braking when I see the tail lights ahead of me brake. Just because I know he is in front of me does not mean that I am not scared. I can't see the future or where I will end up. I was obedient to apply to law school when God asked me to, but now I have to wait weeks for any kind of answer. I have no idea how I will pay for law school or even my internship that begins in two months.

All I can do is follow the lights in front of me. I can't pass and try and lead the way (like I usually try to do) because then I will really be lost. God promises to take care of us on our journey "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

God never says that the weather will always be sunny or a complete storm will fall on us, sometimes we are just in a fog. God is reminding us that he is in control and as long as we keep our eyes on him he will lead us to where we need to be, even if that is not where we originally thought the journey was taking us.

Walking to tear down walls

Following God doesn't always look the way we thought it would. Today I was reading Joshua 6, and the story basically is about how this hero Joshua leads his people to a crushing (literally) defeat of Jericho. Now there is a slight twist in this story, Joshua's people didn't fight or use any tools/ weapons to get into the impenetrable city.

Jericho was the biggest baddest place around, it had huge walls and no one was aloud in or out. God came to Joshua and told him that he would defeat Jericho, but it was in an unusual way. God actually asked Joshua to walk around the city every day for six days, then on the seventh day walk around the city seven times and scream. Then, the angel of the Lord said the city will crumble and be yours.

Now if I was receiving these instructions I would probably laugh. God, how can walking destroy a city? How can screaming tear down brick walls? Joshua didn't ask any questions though, he was obedient without the "how".

I feel like God has called me to some amazing things like International Justice Mission (IJM) and law school, but I can't see the how. I feel like God is asking me to just walk in circles for no reason. I don't understand why this is happening or how things can get done without me making things happen.

If I was in Joshua's army I would worry that I wasn't doing enough. If God really told us we would take Jericho than we should start striking the wall with weapons and fighting till the last breath to get to where God wants us to be, but that would still be doing things my way.

I try to listen to God and as soon as I hear the first thing he wants me to do, I do it full strength. I think God loves that about our faith when we are willing to do everything to get to his plan for us, but we also need to remember it is still His plan. Law school and an internship in DC was never a part of my plan, so when God let me in on the secret I started planning how I would do what God wants for me.Don't get me wrong, it is great to dream, but we also need to be obedient when God is asking us to do little things that may not make an instant impact on our dreams.

Joshua walked around the wall for six days, I wonder if he was looking for a crack in the wall with every step he took. I wonder if he wanted God to explain how walking could contribute to the demise of a city. Maybe each step put pressure on some platelet underneath the city and the magnetic force would.... or maybe God just wanted Joshua to be obedient and show both armies His power.

Right now I am in my "six days". I feel like God has called me to a Jericho but I can't get inside the walls yet. I worry about the finances and where I will live, I worry about the applications and the personal statements, but the truth is I can't do this my way. I need to listen to what God is asking me to do. I still need to take action, but the action might be waiting and praying for God to do a miracle.

God has called all of us to amazing things and he knows the best way for us to reach what we are looking for. We just need to surrender our ways to God. Even if that means walking for a while and seeing no progress, we never know when the day will come when God will tell us to scream and the walls will fall down.

The Ultimate Surgeon

Mark 2:17 says "On hearing this, Jesus said to them, 'It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but the sinners.'"

I am sure many people have heard this verse, but have you ever really thought about it. I was thinking about this verse and instantly thought of Grey's Anatomy (just me, okay good), anyways on a more relevant note I started thinking about how Jesus did come as a surgeon. Not just for the body, but for the mind and spirit.

So this lead me to start thinking about how a surgeon operates. The surgeon never forces anyone to have surgery, he or she simply tells the person why they are feeling sick and that if they don't have the surgery they will get worse. The surgery is long and the recovery process will be hard and painful, but the thing inside of you is killing you. Surgeons are experienced and have a lot more medical knowledge than most of us combined, but surgery is still a scary thing.

This is how I feel like God operates. The bible is kind of like Web MD (maybe slightly more accurate) in giving you the symptoms of what is healthy and what makes you sick. Once we begin feeling sick we check our handy-dandy Bible and "type in our symptoms". Symptoms for today could be a bit of jealous, maybe a little pride and just a dab of lust. You search the results and find out what you have is terminal and can only be fixed with surgery. The surgery has a 100% recover rate if the patient fallows all post-op instructions. We then have the chance to talk to the surgeon about it. God tells us that we can't keep any of the bad stuff inside. He needs to remove it all. Would you say yes to the surgery?

If we were honest I think some of us would still be really hesitant. I am not saying it is easy to sign over our lives to God, because it is not easy. He requires us to completely trust his surgical hands. I worry that when I get out of surgery I won't feel like myself, I worry he will take more than he said he would, I worry that the pain and recovery process will be to hard. Some of us have seen people go through the surgery and still end up terminal later in life, others have had the surgery before and felt mislead about the recovery process.

I need to remember that God is a better surgeon than any doctor on Grey's Anatomy. He always has a successful surgery. He never leaves our side to visit other patients. He doesn't even want us to pay him, all we have to do is live our lives according to the post-op instructions. It  might sound easy to give God everything and sign up for the surgery, until he starts sharing some of the risks. We could lose some friends, might need to find some new places to hang out, or even be asked to move across the world to help others realize the need for surgery in their lives. But the risks never out way the rewards. The reward is life! God tells us that if we give him all our yucky stuff and let him heal us and make us new that we can have a full life with him.

A full life is never easy, but it is always worth it.

Don't put all your eggs in one basket, or maybe you should.

I'm sure most of us have heard the phrase "Don't put all your eggs in one basket", and in fact I knew generally what this meant but had never heard an official definition. So I decided to look up what exactly that phrase meant. Dictionary.com defines that phrase as "Don't concentrate all your prospects or resources in one thing or place, or you could lose everything." Well to be honest this was a much stronger definition than I thought. The idea that if you put too much of your resources into something you could literally lose everything.

But what about Faith.

What if God calls you to do something, should we continue to plan for our "plan B"? I am not advocating that we should never have a backup plan or that we should never plan things. However I am saying that I don't think faith needs a backup plan. When God really calls us to do something, he wants us to be all in. Not just our time, not just our money, not just our relationships, but all of it and more. God is asking us if we will put all of our hard earned eggs into his basket. Once the eggs leave our hands the what ifs start coming up. What if everything I am investing in is taken and I lose everything?

I guess my thought is how can we lose everything when we believe that God is our everything and since we can't lose him we can never lose everything (sorry some of my logical reasoning from studying for the LSAT is coming into my thinking lately).
Deuteronomy 31: 6 says "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

Faith is a pretty scary thing, trust me I get that. Faith means that you are putting every single egg you have into Gods basket, his plan, and there is no way to know for sure... but God does promise that everything he does is to better us and not harm us. When I felt like God called me to law school I had no idea why he would do that, or how it would happen. Does he know how many loans I already have? Does he know that I am less qualified than almost any other applicant? Does he know how much it costs just to apply, let alone how much law school is? God why would you call me to something that bleeds me dry? The only answer I have to offer is faith. I have always trusted God and he has never let me down. All I can do is keep giving him my eggs.

Some people think I am crazy and ask me what I will do when this "law school thing" doesn't work out, they want to know what my plan B is. The truth is I don't have one. If for some reason Gods plan changes and I don't go, then I trust he will provide me with a different opportunity. All God asks of me right now is to do my best and put everything into what I think would please him. So I am. I am studying almost every day for a test that is in two more months. I am buying all the materials I need to succeed because faith doesn't mean I just sit around and wait for God to accept me into my dream school, it requires work.  Faith is work. Putting all my eggs in one basket is hard! Trusting God when you can't see the end game is so hard, but so rewarding. I am thankful to have grown up watching my parents not have a plan B. They recently moved to New Zealand because God asked them to. Yes, it was scary and yes they worried about what if it didn't work. But, they still kept putting all their eggs in the basket God had given them. They didn't save one car "just in case" they come back early. They didn't keep the house "just in case". They gave it all to God and I was able to see how God provided for them in ways that their plan B could have never done.

I don't have all the answers about when is it okay to have a backup plan and when is it okay to just have faith. The truth is, God will tell you if you ask him. Faith is not one size fits all. Faith is available in all shapes and sizes, but it looks different for everyone. For me I had to make a commitment and start focusing all I have on this new path. For my family it was letting go of everything that was familiar and safe for the unknown. Putting all your eggs in one basket is never easy, but faith reminds us that we can never truly lose everything, only gain more of a trust in God.

Piece of a Puzzle

Everyone does puzzles a little bit differently; some people find all the outer pieces and work their way in, some work on specific colors or shapes, and some that are like me just jab at all the pieces until something fits. The really intense puzzle people don't even look at the box, they just know exactly how everything should fit, in case you were wondering I am not one of those people.

I'm sure many of us have heard analogies about life and puzzle pieces, but bear with me. Imagine that your whole life is a bunch of puzzle pieces. Each year/ moment/ event is a piece. Except we can't see the box...or most of the pieces.

Honestly, I have no idea where I will be in the next five years, or even the next five days. But I continue to try and put the pieces together myself. I know God is powerful and has a plan for my life, but I still try and put the puzzle of my life together. Sometimes I will look up to God (who has the box and knows what all the pieces are) and ask if these two pieces go together, then before he has a chance to respond I start jabbing away trying to make it fit. Once I break off a few of the unnecessary edges I proudly say that they definitely do fit together! Until much later when I realized that the original piece was supposed to fit somewhere else in my life.

I tend to see other people who have their lives together and I wonder why can't my puzzle look like that, and then I might even start trying to fit my pieces together to look like theirs. Sometimes I will see someone who also has a mind like mine and they are doing amazing things to help people all over the world, so I start trying to use my strength in the same way that they do...but it won't fit. We can't base our puzzle on the pieces that other people have put together.

The more I try to put my life pieces together the more I get confused. I ask God how does law school fit into the puzzle? What about the husband piece? What piece has my future city on it? What about the finance piece? I keeping looking for the pieces myself, when God is patiently waiting for me to hand him one to use.

At the end of our lives we will finally see every piece come together, but we can't right now no matter how hard we try. Lately I just keep feeling like God is asking me to give him the pieces of my puzzle one at a time and he will put them together. Okay God, you want my future location here take it, you want my time it's yours, God you can have all of my pieces because I literally have no idea what to do with them. I am so thankful to have a just and loving God to put my life together. I know that I am not giving things up just for fun, but that I will have so much more joy and peace once I am not spending so much time putting the pieces together myself.

God has already begun to show me how he has put pieces together over the course of my life and seeing what he has done in the past encourages me to keep trusting that everything will be put together according to his perfect plan.

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Stop trying to jab the pieces together and just hand off one piece at a time. God will create a beautiful masterpiece even better than what we can dream of ourselves.